IT’S A NO-HITTER, SO SHUT UP


Madison Bumgarner is a LHP for Arizona. You may remember him pitching for San Francisco in that wild-card playoff game in 2014, when he stuck the Pirates’ bats up their backsides. 

Bumgarner did the same to Atlanta yesterday, pitching a no-hitter. 

Except almost as soon as the game was over, MLB ruled it wasn’t really a no-hitter. The game was half of a doubleheader, and so went seven innings. (The Braves got just one hit in the other game. It may have been the most pathetic one-day display of “offense” in MLB history.) 

MLB says no-hitters must go nine innings. 

I disagree. Bumgarner pitched as many innings as were scheduled. If it’s not an “official” game, why do the stats count? Why does the result count? (The 2020 MLB season was 60 games. Does that mean Los Angeles didn’t really win the World Series?) 

More insanely, why did MLB choose to invalidate a great moment? Cui bono? 

MLB is its own worst enemy. MLB has fouled its own record book and its Hall of Fame. MLB defecates on what it should embrace, including Bumgarner’s no-hitter. It won’t fix what it should, especially games being too long. (I’d make all the games seven innings.) 

What good comes from MLB declaring that Bumgarner’s performance isn’t a no-hitter? 

Baseball constantly uses its perceived purity to jump up its own rectum.

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